What is Toxic Positivity?

Last week, I went on vacation with my husband and three adult daughters. We spent time resting well,  having fun together and connecting.  I’m intentionally applying all I am teaching in my summer series to my personal life, and I’m dragging my family along for the ride.  So far it’s working really well! 

For example, I took many pictures of the flowers that were blooming. I’m in a season of focusing on the word “flourishing” - in my life, in my business, and in my relationships.  I noticed the flourishing that was evident in every garden I walked past. 

Did you know that once our brain has a thought, it often finds evidence that the thought is true? If you buy a red Kia,  you may notice all the red Kia’s on the road. Because the word “flourishing” is at the forefront of my thoughts currently, I couldn’t help but notice the flourishing in nature around me.  And it brought me great joy.

I think that being the best version of yourself is another type of flourishing, and is extremely important.

However, it doesn’t happen automatically.  And It’s not easy. We must take ownership and be intentional or it simply won’t happen.

And flourishing doesn’t mean always feeling happy or ONLY having good things happen.

In other words, I encourage you to resist “Toxic Positivity”, which is “the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset” (https://www.verywellmind.com/).

Life is actually 50/50, and pretending otherwise is not healthy. 

Living with a healthy soul means it is essential to care for our soul and to live in reality & not pretend “everything is awesome”. 

Having a healthy soul does NOT mean pretending you are happy when you are not, or producing positive social media posts to make it seem that way. The coaching I have invested in has helped me learn this skill and I want to help you.

I am so proud of the community I have been cultivating.

I would love to have you join us in July & August for sessions 4-6 of Soul Care & Sunshine.

In the meantime, I am offering a workshop on Wednesday, July 6th at noon and again at 7 pm. 

It is only $29.00 and is a great first step for anyone who is ready to flourish. Want to hear more about it? Click here to join us at noon on July 6th, or the second option of Juny 6th 7pm and I will send the details :)

If my summer workshop and SoulCare series are not for you, but you have a friend in mind, I encourage you to invite them to join my FB group-I’ll have all the details there!

Cheering for you,

Kelly

What's your favorite breakfast?

Healthy thought management can transform your whole life.

Do you have a favorite easy-to-make breakfast?

I love overnight oats. Most days it is oat milk, oats and berries.

My go-to flavor in the fall is pumpkin pie.

Bob’s Red Mill steel-cut oats, chia seeds, oat milk, and a swirl of pumpkin butter from Trader Joe’s. I mix it on Sunday, (no cooking needed!!!) and leave it in my fridge in mason jars. I top it with yogurt on the day I eat it. Sometimes I add fruit or nuts. Oh my- it is so good and makes me want to get up and start my day just to get to breakfast time.

However, one thing I have noticed is that every year around Christmas time, I no longer want pumpkin anything. Nothing changes, except my thoughts.

Pumpkin, in January? Nope.

If you spend time with me you know I am always talking about the power of thoughts. It is why I am a life coach. I think that one of the fundamental ingredients to living a brave, creative, purpose-filled life is thought management. 

Healthy thought management can transform your whole life.

Did you know that you have complete authority over your own thoughts, feelings, and actions? You GET to decide to think about things that are true and life-giving.

The only way to claim this authority is to learn how to vigilantly supervise your own brain. 

This is NOT EASY. Even for me.

Last night I had a few thoughts passing through my brain and I did not notice them until I recognized the feelings they create- terror.

My brain could easily write a season of any crime show. 

It is why I have invested weekly in coaching for over 18 months. It takes work to manage my brain. Currently, I am in a coaching program that meets more than once a week.

My work this fall has been to discern what thoughts I want to keep. As the other thoughts are noticed, I am learning how to show up with compassion for myself. I have a human brain. I am doing the work that allows me to stop judging myself for feeling terror. I have heard it said, what we resist, persists.

So I am learning to notice, allow and practice new thoughts. I am trying things like speaking to my stomach- can you relax a little and breathe the stress out? 

Learning and applying these tools has helped so many of the people in my coaching circles.

I know they can help you become brave, creative, and purpose-filled. Join us!

Brad Paisley was AWESOME!

One year ago today, I ended a 17-year career as a pastor to begin my full-time season as a life coach. A lot of things have happened this last year, but one of the most significant changes I made was I started asking myself, “Do I want to say yes?”

What changed my life the most this last year was this powerful question, Do I want to say yes?

For many of you, this is a natural thing in your life- knowing when you want to say yes and when you want to say no. But for many years, my ability to say yes and no started with the question, “What would the person asking me want?”

One recent experience highlighted this change. On a Friday night in September, a friend offered me free tickets to see Brad Paisley in concert.

Like most things in life, there were questions about what to do. Life is often 50/50- good and hard all at the same time.

The concert was about an hour away and it was pouring rain.  I do not enjoy driving at night. 

I love concerts and have not been to one since 2020.  The artist is one I really like.

Great friends and great seats!! 

What did I want to do? 

Over the last year, I’ve been investing time in learning how to notice my thoughts and keep the ones that serve me rather than reacting to the automatic. Did you know that many of our thoughts are unhelpful and just plain inaccurate? And much of those thoughts are on autopilot, like a bad habit.  

But I’m learning that we can change these unhelpful thought patterns. I’m getting better at learning when to say yes and no with more clarity and mindfulness rather than passively reacting to what I think/predict those around me would want.

I decided to say yes to the concert.  I asked a few friends to join me, and two said yes.  We had an amazing time together. I’ve never been that close to an artist at a concert before.  It was so fun!

Not only did my “yes” lead to a wonderful night with my friends, it also strengthened my internal spiritual muscle that is helping me live this one precious life. 

This type of processing goes way beyond having a good night out - it can be applied to how you approach your work, your relationships, and your self-care.  Coaching can be truly transformational.  

I am thankful for what coaching is doing for me, applying this work is allowing me to live a brave, creative, purpose-filled life.  And I want to share what I’ve learned with you!

Small Steps & Sticky Notes

Hey there, I have a quick question-

Are you a bigger fan of Summer or Fall?
Summer feels free and fun & Fall often brings consistency. I love them both, but summer wins in my book.

I am sitting on my porch and the breeze and temperature feel like it is September.

There's something about the fall,  isn't there?? 
Does it make you want to clean a closet, organize the basement or buy some back-to-school clothes? Those are wonderful things, and we can do them in a few weeks...

What are you looking forward to doing this August? I would love for you to say on August 31st- I did it!!!

If we do not decide to INVEST in what is important, the urgent daily responsibilities often keep us too overwhelmed to create the results we want. That is why I think every person needs a coach.

One of my FAVORITE ways to get things done is to use sticky notes!

Here’s how- grab 3  sticky notes and a sharpie.

Choose 1 result you want to have on August 31st- Going to the beach or seeing that movie or reading that book are awesome, but what is one project you have put off and would love to complete in August?

Decide to do 3 small things every day! Small steps move you in the right direction.

Write one step on each Sticky note ( you will need at least 3) and put them somewhere you will see. 

By the end of this week, show yourself that you're somebody who decides what's important and then you do it. Important results are worth investing in.  30 minutes today ( 3-10 minute small steps) is the path to invest your BEST energy back into your life.                                               

Cheering for you!

Kelly

Decide & Do...something fun!

Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got
Taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot
Wouldn't you like to get away?

Did you love "Cheers"? 

I grew up near Boston and I loved that show, but I have not thought about it in years. That song jumped in my mind as my husband and I crossed the Bourne Bridge for a quick 2 day/one-night trip to our favorite place. I really needed to get away.

It was not easy for me to decide to go, because I was thinking thoughts that DID NOT serve me. However, I am SO glad that I moved appointments around, (and changed my thoughts!) so that we could be spontaneous and invest in time together. There is no urgent energy in most relationships, but they are important. My relationship with my husband is SO important. That is why I am so thankful that I have learned how to decide and do fun things.

We squished a week of fun in less than 48 hours- which meant "laying out at the beach" took place from 9:30-11 am on our second day. My view looked like this photo. So beautiful!

We drove home through a HUGE rainstorm (I am so glad my husband Fred is the one who drives :) and as we fell asleep in our OWN bed I realized that a small trip away is as fun as a week away.

The truth is until we decided to do that quick trip, we had ONE thought around vacations at the Cape- "vacations are when all 5 of us are together and are one week-long". That thought kept us from going away these last two years because we could not find one week with free time for five people. 

I LOVE Cape Cod! I am thankful we went.

What is something you LOVE to do? What thoughts do you have about doing it?

When was the last time you noticed your thoughts and decided on purpose if you wanted to keep a thought or try on a new thought? When you notice how the new thought makes you feel, maybe you will decide and do something fun this week?

Decide and do! My 2021 Summer book The Artist's Way calls fun outings "a weekly date". I love the new thought that the weekly date can be me alone, having fun.

If you are like me, that is a thought that is a new thought. 

New thoughts can create uncomfortable feelings. That's ok. We can be uncomfortable while we learn new things, right?

DO you know that you are so valuable? I know it, and I am holding space for you while you learn to believe it.

Do you believe that you should schedule fun weekly? I do:)  Go plan something!

Here are some thoughts. Maybe they make you feel uncomfortable, but try them on anyway...
You are worth:

• 30 minutes in the morning to decide how to invest your day's energy

• finding and doing movement that you enjoy ( I love kickboxing!)

• making and eating food that makes your body feel good

• time with friends that make you feel seen and loved

• investing in...YOU CAN create a brave, creative, and purpose-filled life

If self-care feels hard, I understand. I spent so many years pouring into others and without investing energy into what fuels me. I ended up feeling quite depleted in my soul.

Today, I am truly flourishing. Not perfect in any way, but living a brave, creative, purpose-filled life. That is what I want for you.

The sun always returns

I am adding some older blogs from a decade or more ago…WEDNESDAY, JULY 1, 2009

July 2009- we only saw the sun for part of 6 days in June- I discovered I like dreary days

It must be because I prefer the inside to the outside.

I am trying to start my day w/ my quiet time. When I wake up I listen for a song in my heart. Here are the words for today.

It is only Grace- It's Only Love- It's only mercy and believe me, it's enough
your sins are gone-they're washed away- there's nothing left here-there's only Grace

No need for me to try to impress God He has done it all
Jeremiah 9:23-24 —
This is what the Lord says:
"Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom
or the strong man boast of his strength
or the rich man boast of his riches,
but let him who boasts boast about this:
that he understands and knows me,
that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight,"
declares the Lord.

How true this is of me- I want to boast about how smart I am, forgetting that any wisdom I may have is God's gift to me...no boasting of my strength though.

I am praying that God will help me pattern exercise into my life.
And I am so thankful for the blessing of neither poverty nor riches, he has blessed with a wonderful life...but no vast riches that we need to care for....

God, you know I want to know you, and be transformed by my understanding of you.
Thank you that you are kind, help me to love justice and righteousness- just as you do...help me stand up for what is right...

A morning song

A morning song

I read somewhere that the Holy Spirit will put a song in your heart each morning- I have been trying to listen for one each day- today it was a favorite from GCS-
"They say we need money and power
they say there's no God up above
Don't they know our friend in high places
nothing is stronger than love
Seek first the kingdom of heaven
and all shall be added..."

That is what I am trying to do...seek His will
Allow Jesus to be the "firstborn" and rest in His strength.....

The verse for today-
“The LORD will be king over the whole earth. On that day there will be one LORD, and his name the only name.”- Zechariah 14:9

I am so thankful God that you are Lord-

TUESDAY, JUNE 30, 2009

My favorite books- Fall 2020

What are some things that help you love the “cold season”.

It snowed here yesterday, ( late October), so the cold season began a bit earlier than it has in other years.

The way I have learned to enjoy this time of year is I DECIDE to enjoy it.

It starts in my mind. My thoughts matter.

One of my favorite ways to find joy when it is cold outside, is I love to sit with a blanket and a good book.

The photo above contains some of my favorite books.

Photo one- My favorite books on systems
Photo two- TWO of my favorite Bible Studies
Photo three- Three books to care for your soul
Photo four- A few books by upcoming podcast guest
Photo five- Three books to INVEST in you!!!
AND photo six- Two of my favorite FUN books!

Some days are hard

Today is one of those perfect Fall days in New England.

As I drove with the windows down, and sang songs and smiled…joy filled my soul.

And some days are like this.

Some days are not.

Some days are hard. Some days are brutal.

In both kinds of day, God is with us. He cares for us.  He is faithful forever and He is perfect.

Days like today help us, help me believe truth.

But a momentary sorrow can upend joy.

Especially when we choose to believe the lie that we are some kind of mistake.

A failure. Not wanted. Not loved.

We are not mistakes…and our failures and our success do not define us.

God turns our failures into good for us and for His glory.

Aaron Keyes wrote it this way-”Even what the enemy intended for evil-God will turn it to good and use it for His glory”.

In the valley in the shadow of death- God is faithful, He is with us- we are never alone.

I think one of the saddest lies we hear is that

God will not give us more than we can handle.

The truth is-we cannot handle most of what life throws at us.

But God can. 

We need to be reminded of the truth.

He is with us in the fire, in the flood.

In the sunny, crisp Fall days- in the good times.

In the bitter cold and rain and snow- in the hard times.

God is with us.

This morning I had coffee with two friends. We talked about the value of a table.

Where there is room for all of us.

Where we can be real- and be reminded that we are loved.

Our souls were created to be in relationship with people who see us and with the God who made us and loves us.

In the book of Romans it says we long for this. We wait and anticipate this day

 All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it’s not only around us; it’s within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We’re also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance. That is why waiting does not diminish us; any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting.

We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.

How amazing- those things we dread- death, pain sorrow…they enlarge our souls, increase our capacity to love and care for others…IF we choose to allow God to do what he can do, turn all things good

Here is the good news-Christ has come.

Lived a perfect life, died on the cross and His blood covered all of our sin- redeemed us from the Kingdom of darkness and transferred us to the Kingdom of light.

And today we are in this waiting room of life and as we wait for for His return- we have 2 choices- we can worry or we can worship.

So today, around a table and walking in the sunshine- I choose to worship.

And I know that every moment I worry, I lose the chance to worship for one more moment.

So I am expectant and excited about what the season ahead will bring.

And I am looking forward to the transformation that will take place around a table.

My very, very quiet house

The dog is asleep...the girls have returned to college. Or they are with a friend. Or at work. The important thing, is they have a life that is fully their own. The once noisy and messy house is clean and quiet.

It is so very, very quiet.

The only sound this morning was the bird that sings outside my window.

Sometimes I think my house is too quiet. “I do not like this Sam I am”

I wish for the mess that once made me crazy. The hall from the garage to the kitchen is tidy. Shoes are with their owners.

Things do not get very messy now that little feet, once covered in mud, have been replaced by adult toes painted in pretty colors. Little baby feet fresh from the tub, oh they were my favorite!

My very quiet house makes me miss the days when they walked here.

When they have a break from school or work, they eat here- they sleep here. But the steps they take move them outside this home, this yard, this street.

They are wonderful girls. They make me smile. They are smart and fun and kind.

Most of all - they are so easy to be with.

There are no more temper tantrums, no fighting over shared toys. No need to clean out the bathtub moments after it was filled with warm water. Gone are the days of squirming toddlers running with a towel or toothbrush. Their bathroom is clean.

The kitchen is also clean and quiet. I do not make mac and cheese 2 times a day. In 3 different shapes.

My adult daughters cook and clean better than I do. Most days that makes me feel so proud.

Today, I am wistful.

The bird reminds me that it is quiet, and I long for the busy morning sounds and the mess of brown bag lunches for three girls who liked sandwiches without crusts and apples cut in slices with the core removed.

The bus stops near my house on the first day of school.

I remember how I used to spend most of my day driving them to and from school and dance and church.

Now I drive where I want, when I want…listening to what I want to listen to. So much joy! Morning is slow.

We were so busy on a school morning; we would only have a brief moment to pray a quick phrase, asking God to bless them and keep them.

But now, quiet moments with God is something they do alone. Something I do alone.

As it should be. Adults. That’s the goal!

It is what I wanted.

It is what I want.

To raise smart, brave, kind, and loving women has been a blessing.

A gift.

“One thing I ask and one thing I seek, that they would dwell in the house of the Lord forever .”

But now that my house is very clean and very, very quiet.

There are moments when I miss my messy, noisy home.

Live your best life

I recently updated the software on my smart phone and there was a limit set for my “screen time.” A message appeared, asking, “Do you want to ignore limit?” 

Hmm, do I?

Do I want to live my life with limits? Do I beleive that limits are good? I have learned that-

Limits are a gift from God

They help us to live our best life.

We like to believe that we can live beyond limits and grab all we can from life. “The sky is the limit!” we say. But our life is full of limits. We each have different amounts of money, energy, or talents. Even our closets or the size our home is a limit.

But have you ever considered that limits are a gift from God? Stop and think about what happens when we walk through life ignoring the limits God has given us. We move beyond capacity and become worn out, physically, mentally and emotionally. It affects our health, our minds, our relationships and our work.

In Genesis 1, we see that God created our universe. He created day and night, giving it a limit of 24 hours. No matter who we are, where we come from or what we do, each one of us is given the same number of hours in a day; no more, less.

When it comes to work, God knew, that in our never-ending hunger for more, we would try to fill every hour and day with as much as we can, never stopping to rest. He was loving and kind enough to give us the gift of limits to our work and He, himself, is our example. Genesis 2:2 says, “On the seventh day God had finished his work of creation, so he rested from all his work.” 

As he created the nation of his chosen people, he provided the same limit and calls for the Sabbath; a day of rest, set apart and holy. “Remember to observe the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. You have six days each week for your ordinary work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath day of rest dedicated to the Lord your God. On that day no one in your household may do any work. This includes you, your sons and daughters, your male and female servants, your livestock, and any foreigners living among you. For in six days the Lord made the heavens, the earth, the sea, and everything in them; but on the seventh day he rested.”

Sabbath is to be enjoyed. It reminds us that we are both beloved and dust. “For he knows us, but we are dust.” (Psalm 103:14) Jesus, the greatest gift that God has given us, put on flesh and became dust through his death on the cross so that we can believe that we are his beloved. The cross is not simply where we are saved. It is our place of rest where Jesus did for us what we could not do for ourselves. He paid the price for sin, once for all, so that we no longer work and strive to be in right standing with God. Rather, we can rest in the grace offered in the finished work of Jesus.

Jesus brought us back to God and we are loved. When we believe we are loved, we are free to rest. We stop striving, knowing that our Identity is not found in what others say, or what we do, or don’t do. We are not afraid of Sabbath. Many of us have never given ourselves permission to join in this rest that is offered, and the idea seems foreign and even frightening. Have you ever worried about who will do ‘all the things’ if you stop and rest?

So how do we return to the place of rest? How do we embrace our limits and let go of the illusion that we are indispensable? The truth is we are not needed. Remember, we are but dust. But the good news is, we are wanted. Knowing that we are loved and wanted changes the lens of how we view the limits God created helping us to recognize them for the gift they are.

Our world will look like the Kingdom of God that Jesus spoke about when we live as loved children. When we believe that limits are a gift from a good and loving God that says to us, “You are my beloved and you are enough.”

In Jeremiah 16, the Lord says, “Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it and find rest for your souls.” Sabbath is as ancient as the beginning of creation. It is the good way that God wants us to walk in and it is where God provides rest for our souls.

Could you use some rest for your soul? God cares about your soul and created ways for us to give our soul the care it needs. He wants us to stop our work and rest and to engage in activities that restore and replenish us.

Taking time for Sabbath rest has transformed my life. I like to use the acronym S.W.O.R.D. to help me to be mindful of continuing to delight in the gift of God’s rest:

Stop Working

Observe

Rest

Delight

Stop working - Sabbath is first and foremost a day of stopping. “To stop” is literally the meaning of the Hebrew word Sabbath.  Yet most of us can’t stop. There’s always one more goal to be reached before stopping.

But on Sabbath I embrace my limits. God is God and I am his. This is the most important relationship in our lives, and it needs time. I realized how easy it is to skim on my time with God and then to do things that he never asked me to do.

In Matthew 11, Jesus shares words that could be speaking to many of us today. “Are you tired? Worn out from religion? Come to me. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me. Watch how I do it.

Faithfully observing Sabbath is not to become legalistic. What about people who work on Sundays? Or when you have a sick family member or small children? Jesus observed Sabbath but he also healed the sick on the Sabbath. What might be work for you may be different for someone else and that’s ok.

Sabbath is less about the day, and more about our heart. The key is to set a regular rhythm.

You might start with just one night; light a candle, say a prayer, shut off your phone and go to bed early. It’s the beginning of a new habit and our habits create our lives. They must start before they can be improved!

Observe – Take time to observe what God is showing you. Observe scripture. What is God speaking? What is God teaching you? Journaling is a great way to capture your thoughts and the things God is speaking to your heart. Even if you start with just one word.

God is always speaking but we need to stop long enough to observe what he is saying. I am also aware how much joy there is in my life when I stop work to be with God; to worship him and to observe what He is saying and doing. I notice that I am better at loving others. Most importantly I able to love myself when I rest and when I delight.

Rest – Once we stop, we accept God’s invitation to rest. God rested after his work of creation and he invited us to do the same every seventh day.

He wants us to have activities that restore and replenish us.  Some of us need an earlier bedtime and a nap. But for others, rest is hiking, reading, or making and eating good food.  Resting from unpaid work involves some planning but you will find that being intentional about taking time to rest will not diminish your productivity, but rather, enhance it!

Delight – Finally, on Sabbath, we Delight. When was the last time you spent a whole restful day enjoying yourself or found yourself taking true delight in anything? Have you ever watched a small child take sheer delight in something? It fills us with joy and makes us smile. God feels the same way when he sees us, his creation and children, delighting in the things he has given us.

God loves us so much he wants us to slow down, pay attention, observe and worship and rest. After finishing his work of creation, God pronounced it “very good” (Genesis 1:31).  It was a joyful celebration and he invites us to do the same. He invites us to join in the celebration; to enjoy and delight in his creation and the gifts he offers us, through people, places and things.

What give you joy and delight? Is it going to the ocean?  Or perhaps hiking in the mountains, having people around a table playing games, a long drive with good music, a city lit up at night, or maybe just curling up with a good book. Whatever it is, make time to delight!

You are already enough and so loved. Choose to believe that God loves you and is for you. Accept his invitation and receive his gift of limits. Embrace his gift of Sabbath!

Overcome being overwhelmed

How tired are you today? Would a quick nap fix your tired eyes?

Or do you need three weeks alone on an island?

Maybe OVERWHELMED is a better word to describe how you feel ? Or have you reached a place where you feel burned out and wish there was no more work to do?

If you find yourself saying, “there are just not enough hours in the day!”, consider the number of hours we work; both paid and unpaid. Add to that the time we spend taking care of our homes, families, self-care, volunteering and perhaps even a second job, and it can certainly feel that way. We are spending most of our waking hours working and it can become a grind. I can also accidentally spend hours each day on my phone. Is it any wonder we are exhausted?!

 And yet the bible tells us in Ecclesiastes 3:22

There’s nothing better for a person than to enjoy their work.

If that is true, and we are working so much of the time, then why are we not full of joy? Is the Word of God out of touch with our modern culture? Of course not! The problem is not with our ability to have joy. The problem is with our perception of work.

The truth is, God created work, and what He creates is for our benefit.

In Genesis 2:15, we see that God created work in the garden, “The Lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to tend and watch over it.” Work was good! It glorifies God and it helps us to enjoy Him. 

Whether it’s making breakfast and doing the dishes on a Saturday morning, or catching a train to get to a day filled with meetings, work is part of our lives. But for many of us, work often feels meaningless and without purpose. We become discouraged in our work and think of how hard, exhausting or annoying it is. It can feel like drudgery.

Or, we make work an idol, getting our identity from our work and thinking that we are what our job says about us. We allow our work, our title, or our income to define us, getting caught in the never-ending need to keep up. Idols lead us to overwork, to be ruthless or unhealthy. They look like worry or micromanagement and they fill our lives with anxiety, anger, and discouragement.

None of this is what God intended. Our value is not found in what we do but rather in knowing who we are. When we approach work recognizing that God does through us what we could never do on our own, our work changes from selfish, self-centered and competitive, to work marked by meaning and purpose; work that reflects God’s love for the world around us. There is purpose and meaning to our work. So why doesn’t it feel that way all too often?

When God gave work to Adam, he told him to tend or care for God’s creation, the garden. God gave Adam responsibility with authority.  However, in Genesis 3, sin entered the world and ever since, everything in creation no longer functions as it was intended, including work, and we separate God’s work from the work we do to make a living. But the good news is that there is redemption. Because Jesus conquered sin and death, we are “The hands & feet of God.” We understand, in whatever we do, we are to “work heartily” as for the Lord and not for men. We get to choose to work with our whole heart, because inner work we are serving God and He is our reward.

 “And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” Col 3:17

 God invites us to join him in His work.

He wants our work; our mental or physical effort, filled with His Spirit and His power, to achieve the purpose or the result He created us for. Every part of human life; our soul, our body, our praying, and our working, all of it was made by God, for God. And all of it was affected by sin.

Sure, there is no escaping that work can be hard. We can put mental and physical effort into something and feel like we did not achieve the purpose or result we wanted. Work can also be painful.

The curse on the fallen world is that labor can feel fruitless, pointless, and meaningless.

After the fall, God said to the woman “I will make your pain in childbearing very severe. With painful labor you will give birth to children.” He said to Adam, “The very ground is cursed because of you. Getting food from the ground will be as painful as having babies is for your wife. You’ll be working in pain all your life. The ground will sprout thorns and weeds. You’ll get your food the hard way, planting, tilling, harvesting, sweating in the fields from dawn to dusk.”

These great tasks of life-our job, careers, projects, childbirth (and with it, family life; marriage, raising children) and work are often excruciatingly hard. But just as childbirth is not a curse, neither is work a curse. But they can feel like a curse. But as Lysa Turkurst says “Feelings are indicators, but they are not truth”.

The truth is God invites us to join him-right here, right now, in His work.

As a young mom, much of my work took place at home. I can remember how my work felt fruitless because I spent hours putting away toys, washing dishes, making dinner, running baths and I would fall asleep exhausted each night. When I woke up in the morning there were only a few brief moments before the sink was full of dishes and there were toys on the floor, once again. There were many days that my work felt meaningless.

If you’re looking for success by the fruits of your labor as a young mom, you may come up empty.

But today, as the mom of adult daughters, I see the joy that those years contained. I have also poured myself into roles as a teacher and a pastor. Work that can also feel like there may not be any point to it. But then, a decade later-someone will point to a word I spoke over them and the impact it had on their life.

Work is not meaningless or purposeless.

However, work can feel meaningless. We are made on purpose for a purpose. But we can invest our life in what God created us to do, or we can chase feelings of happiness, meaning and purpose.

How many of us walk through life thinking that the next step in life is when we can finally be happy? Whether it’s getting into the college we want, landing a great job, getting married, having children, or buying a house, we are sure that once we obtain any of these, we will be happy and fulfilled. But it only continues. Oh, but wait, if we could just take that dream vacation, and save enough for a fun and meaningful retirement, that will do it! But as the writer of Ecclesiastes says, “The work that is done under the sun was grievous to me. All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.”

Some days are so hard, and maybe that is your day today. SO HARD. Speak truth over your life.

Work is not meaningless or purposeless

Other days we get a glimpse of what work may have been if sin never entered the world and something inside us that knows we were created to make an impact. We were made on purpose for purpose. Live Fully and use those gifts that God has placed inside of you!

Sadly, we get confused about how to live out our purpose and we end up trying to make our name great instead of making God’s name great. We fill our life with things, forgetting that we were created to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.  We love being recognized for our work or the feeling of accomplishment at the end of a day when we have worked hard and can fall asleep knowing that what we did really mattered and we confuse that rewarding feeling with purpose.

First Peter 1:24 says that “all people are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the Word of the Lord endures forever.” Anything we do for ourselves, by ourselves, will not last. But God has called us to partner with him to move His kingdom forward. There is a powerful shift in focus from us to God. If we realize that we are the hands & feet of God serving the community God has placed us in, we will believe that is it not a waste of our time, talent or treasure.

God can use you right now, wherever you are. Meaning and purpose for your life will only be found in God’s big story.

God has redeemed what sin stole.

Meaning in our life happens as we realize that Jesus Christ did the work for us – ALL the work for us - on the cross.  And He offers us rest for our souls. Purpose and meaning will happen in work when God is in His right place and we are in ours. Because of Jesus we do not have to work for the joy of serving others and we don’t have to work to make a name for ourselves.

We have been given a name by Jesus. He calls us chosen, free, forgiven, loved, masterpiece!!

Revelation 2:17 says that “anyone with ears to hear must listen to the Spirit and understand what he is saying. I will give to each on a white stone, and on the stone will be engraved a new name that no one understands except the one who receives it.”

Just like Queen Esther in the Book of Esther, who surrendered her life to God’s purpose, each of us also stands here because the God who goes before us and is here with us brought us here, “for such a times as this.” Whether we work in our home or outside the home, God can, and will, use us. If you are retired and your work is to pray, know that is the most important work. If your work is to care for someone, that is the most important work. If your work is to study or lead meetings or file papers, that is the most important work. Know that we are each where today because God has put us here for such a time as this.

If work on its own is what brings our life its meaning, it will never succeed. It’s the hope of God within you that brings meaning to work. As men and women, we are made in the image of God.  Jesus came to seek and save the lost, to have us place our life in his hands.

When we forget this, we put our hopes and dreams in the work of making a home, raising kids, building a bank account, getting to the next step on the corporate ladder or becoming known for our work. If our hope is built on anything other than Jesus’ righteousness, our work begins to feel meaningless instead of purposeful. We see our kids, our laundry, and our work as tasks to finish, rather than gifts from God.

The good news is that the gospel gives us a true, satisfying understanding of work by giving us a story for our work and helping us know that our faith allows us to partner with God as He loves and cares for our world.  Mother Theresa said, “I can’t do what you do. You can’t do what I do. But we can make this world better together.”

As loved sons and daughters of God, we help people find their way back to God when we allow God’s purposes to be expressed through each of us and use this one life to glorify God and enjoy Him forever!

Rest, then work

What happens when we walk through life and ignore the limits God has given us as gifts?

We live exhausted lives.

So what is the way to stop being tired all the time?

STOP. REST. And live with the limits that lead to an abundant life.

 One of my favorite quotes comes from Pete Scazzero- “Limits are a gift from God”.

Our life is full of limits. We may not always honor those limits- but they are there. We may have been given different limits to the amount of money, energy and talents we have been given. Even our closets and the size of our home have a limit.  Those limits are gifts. But do we really believe that?

In Genesis 1, we see God create our universe. He creates time- day and night- and they have a limit of 24 hours.

We, His creation, were given the same hours in a day, no matter who we are and what we do.

God created work- it is good, but God also gave us a limit to our work. It is called rest. Genesis 2:2 (NLT) says “ On the seventh day God had finished his work of creation, so he rested  from all his work”.

In  Exodus 20:8-11- we see God creating a nation and he gives them a limit.

(NLT)  “Remember to observe the Sabbath day by keeping it holy.  You have six days each week for your ordinary work,  but the seventh day is a Sabbath day of rest dedicated to the Lord your God. On that day no one in your household may do any work. This includes you, your sons and daughters, your male and female servants, your livestock, and any foreigners living among you.  For in six days the Lord made the heavens, the earth, the sea, and everything in them; but on the seventh day he rested. That is why the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and set it apart as holy.

 This limit is still God’s best for us. Ideally we life a life where we believe that we were created for work and rest. Where we honor the limit of six days of work – and one day to be set apart -Holy-Sabbath…a  day to rest.

I recently read the book Beloved dust- and I love the big idea of that book. We are finite..we have limits…limits that God gives as a gift. One limit is a day a week to rest. Sabbath reminds us we are both beloved and dust. 

The cross is not simply where we are saved, it is our place of rest- where Jesus did for us what we could not do for our selves. He brought us back to God- its why our church exists. When we believe we are loved-We rest.

We stop striving, knowing that our Identity is not found in with others say, or what we do, or don’t do.

When we know we are loved for who we are, not what we do-we are not afraid of Sabbath.

  How do we return to a place of rest?

How do we embrace our limits and let go of the illusion that we are indispensable? 

How do we live in the truth of knowing

We are not needed-we are dust.

but we are wanted-we are God’s Beloved.

Our world looks like the The Kingdom of God that Jesus spoke about when we called us to live as loved children and believe that limits are a gift from a good and loving God.

A God who says you are my beloved and you are enough.

 Have you ever been with a small very tired child who does not believe they are tired. Who does not believe their mom or dad who are BEGGING them to just take a nap?

So many of us are walking though life tired to the core of our soul.

What if we rested, and believed our Father ? What if we honored the Sabbath day?

Sabbath is powerful, it has transformed my life.

So I want us to have a powerful image to help you remember what Sabbath is- it is the powerful SWORD to help you live the life you were created to live. A life where our soul finds rest.

Stop- Working -Observe- Rest- Delight

Jeremiah 16-

This is what the Lord says

·     Stand at the crossroads and look

·     Ask for the ancient paths,

·     Ask where the good way is,

·     Walk in it

·     and find REST for your souls 

Sabbath-is the good way that God wants us to walk in- it is where God provides rest for our soul.

Sabbath begins when we Stop. Sabbath is first and foremost a day of “stopping.” “To stop” is literally the meaning of the Hebrew word Sabbath.

Yet most of us can’t stop. We work until we are finished whatever it is we think we need to do. There’s always one more goal to be reached before stopping. Sabbath is when I embrace my limits.

When I allow God to be God. To know I am his. To give this primary relationship time 

It is too easy to skim on my time with God and then to do things that he never asked me to do.

I am also aware how much joy there is in my life when I stop work- to be with God- to worship him, observe what He is saying and doing, What happens then, is that  I am able to feel His love and love others. Most importantly I able to love myself when I rest and when I delight.

·     Matthew 11, Jesus shares words that could be talking to many of us today  - are you tired, worn out from religion-come to me, I’ll show you how to take a real rest, walk with me, work with me- watch how I do it. (The Message)

  One of the great dangers of faithfully observing Sabbath is legalism. What about people who work on Sundays? Or when you have a sick family member or small children?

Jesus observed Sabbath but he also healed the sick on the Sabbath. What might be work for you may be different for someone else.  That’s ok

Paul wrote about this in Romans 14:1-6 (NLT)  Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong.  For instance, one person believes it’s all right to eat anything. But another believer with a sensitive conscience will eat only vegetables.  Those who feel free to eat anything must not look down on those who don’t. And those who don’t eat certain foods must not condemn those who do, for God has accepted them.  Who are you to condemn someone else’s servants? Their own master will judge whether they stand or fall. And with the Lord’s help, they will stand and receive his approval.

 In the same way, some think one day is more holy than another day, while others think every day is alike. You should each be fully convinced that whichever day you choose is acceptable. Those who worship the Lord on a special day do it to honor him.

 Sabbath is less about the day,

and more about our heart.

The key to Sabbath is to set a regular rhythm. It might start with one night-Lighting a candle when you get home – say a prayer – shut off your phone- go to bed early. Whatever it takes for your first step… Stop Working.

 Have a goal to worship on Sabbath-In Silence, or with music, Art,

As a young mom learned to worship with headphones on while I vacuumed, Sabbath is not just stopping- its stopping our work to allow God to whisper truth to our soul. Where I can hear God loudest is when I am with his people, Worshiping together-it is so powerful. Where can you set apart intentional time to be the church or invite people over.

On the day set apart for my Sabbath- simply make time every week to worship, to be still.

 (O) Observe- the love of God is the central focus of our Sabbaths

Matthew 28:19-20  God and make…

What are you observing right now? What is God teaching you?  Journal even one word..

This year God gave me a word and a verse

Integrate…now I see it in my life

God speaks in Isaiah-

Isaiah 43:19 English Standard Version (ESV)

19 Behold, I am doing a new thing;
    now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness
    and rivers in the desert.

But if there is one thing to Observe, look at scripture

This morning, I was moved by Jesus talking with his disciples- especially Petere

Jesus said As I loved you, love one another

How tired are you?

I asked this last week on FB and had so much interaction- I think many of us are tired.

We have gone past our limits,

God’s gift of the limit 6 days to work and one to rest is that  God invites us to receive HIS   rest

(R) rest-

Rest-  Once we stop, we accept God’s invitation to rest. God rested after his work of creation.

He invited us every seventh day to do the same

He wants us to have activities that restore and replenish us —

Some of us need an earlier bedtime and a nap,

But for others- rest is hiking, reading, or making and eating good food.

 Resting from unpaid work involves planning.

Sabbath for me is easier at the start of the week, but some weeks it is closer to Sunday and I have to trust God to be still.

Finally on Sabbath we Delight-  When was the last time you spent a whole restful day enjoying yourself?

Describe a snow day as a child- snow day deer at my window…pancakes and kids who can’t go anywhere

God loves us so much he wants us to slow down and pay attention. And observe and worship and rest.

After finishing his work of creation, God pronounced it “very good” (Genesis 1:31).  It was joyful and a celebration – and he invites us to do the same.

When I think of delight, I think of my friend’s daughter who loves to cut with scissors.  Nothing makes her happier than spending hours cutting things into small pieces.

Last week she posted a photo on FB of her daughter. The joy on her face when they went to a craft store and she saw a whole wall of scissors. Because- to her  nothing is more delightful than cutting with scissors.

She said one day- I am going to buy all of these!

 What is bringing you joy these days? Are you making time for it?

As part of  Sabbath, God invites us to join in  celebration, to enjoy and delight in his creation and all the gifts he offers us

. These gifts come to us in many ways, including people, places, and things.

“What gives you joy and delight?” going to the ocean,  or hiking in the mountains, and camping under star-filled skies- Is it having people around a table playing games, or a long drive with good music, or is it a chance to take a nap and then read a great book?

Then lets start…

If you can’t think of anything- We have some suggestions on our Ancient Paths calendar.

( Talk about the calendar)

 redeem selfish

stop texting for one day

neighbor or friend for a meal

quiet prayer

board game night ( patti and her joy)

read a book

make time to be in a worship service

Sabbath is an invitation to see the invisible in the visible — to recognize God’s goodness is at work in our lives.

It does not mean we necessarily spend the entire day in prayer or silence, studying Scripture, but those activities might be part of a Sabbath. It can be as simple as choosing one day a week with a heart open and praying two simple words.. “Wow-Thank you”

It is deciding today that God loves you

He is for you

He invites you to receive the gifts of his limits

God made our universe his resting place

Psalm 132:14 

 14 “This is my resting place forever,” he said.
    “I will live here, for this is the home I desired.

 

God -created everything and chose to live with us 

First in the garden, then as Immanuel – God with us.

His limit is a gift- 6 days to work, one to rest.

Don’t leave with regrets, come today and allow rest for your weary soul to replace the need to do more.

Watch how when you stop, the world continues.. 

You are already enough, so loved…

Leave today and believe God’s limits are a gift

Are you tired, worn out from religion-come to me, I’ll show you how to take a real rest, walk with me, work with me- watch how I do it.